Anxious and Irritable

I'm anxious and irritable this evening.  I've been like this for a few days now.  I've also been out of my 'happy pills' for a few days because someone with the money keeps forgetting to pick them up for me. That would be M if you don't know.  He did mail a package to my neice that I've been meaning to send for days now, so at least he did one of my chores for me.  Since he's out and about for his job, it's easier for him to get errands done then it is for me to do them.

Here it is almost 11pm and I'm still wide awake.  My body is tired, but my brain seems to be wide awake.  I might read this in the morning and think otherwise, but for now it seems that way.  Maybe that's the anxiety?

I had a good day with the 30DC.  What's that, you ask?  Some hairbrain idea I got while watching the documentary 'Supersize Me'.  A movie about a guy who only ate McDonald's for a month (was it a month, I can't remember?) and how his health totally declined because of it.  So being the smart one that I am, I came up with the novel idea to give up fast food for a month and see how it makes me feel.  Much to my surprise, a lot of my online friends (shout-out!) decided to do it with me! Even M decided to go along with it and I'm so glad he did. They are the reasons I haven't cheated. (well, there was that one free meal at Chipotle early on, but I digress...). 

So back to my good day.  Yesterday sucked.  I almost cheated and went to get something for lunch.  I was hungry all day and my frozen yuck meal wasn't going to cut it.  Plus I was pissed because the scale said I was back to the same weight I started at a month ago. WTF?!  How is that possible?  I might not be exercising, but I'm certainly cutting half the calories I had normally been consuming up until 9-1-09.  I was strong though and I didn't cheat.  I wanted to SOOOOO bad, but I didn't want to let my girls down!  I felt like I owed it to the ones that have stuck it out so far.  Besides, I'm the one that started this happy horsesh*t so I'll be damned if I'm going to go out...especially this close to the end.  So I was strong.  Oh, I also decided I wasn't going to weigh myself again until 10-1. 

Ya, that didn't work.  I weighed this morning and I was pleasantly surprised (read: SHOCKED) that I had lost 5.5lbs since the beginning of the 30DC.  I don't know how that is possible, but that's what it said.  Well, mid-afternoon I decided to weigh at work (obsessed much?!).  What I saw really SHOCKED me.  The scale reflected a 20lb DROP from what my scale at home said.  How the frick is that possible?!?!  Did someone cut off my leg and I didn't know it??  Luckily I have a coworker who goes to Weight Watchers and I asked her how accurate our scale at work was.  She had just weighed at WW on Monday and when she stood on the scale today she said there was a 4lb difference between the two.  So, and stay with me now; I added the 4lbs to go along with the WW scale, and in one minute I lost 16lbs!!!  I LOST 16 FREAKIN POUNDS!!!!!!!  To go from thinking I weigh XXX to finding out I really weigh 16lbs less than XXX, that's awesome and a great pat on the back to me for sticking with this dumbass challenge!!!  HAHA    I am happy to report that I am down 5.5lbs from the beginning of the month.  At the end of the month I will sit down and figure out how much money we've saved from cutting out the fast food.  That is probably going to be even more shocking than the 16lb instant weight loss!